PERMANENT INKSTAIN FOR ROBYN CARLSON

This is what you've done, each Week. I arrange the rows in reverse chronological order, because there are some Losers, and they know who they are, who check up on my points-awarding every Week.

But I would just like to reiterate that such checking up is not a problem for me. I have said many times that each Loser's enlightened self-interest is my best QA.

If you wish to see what your ink was, refer to the Master Contest List or search All Invitational Text. Remember that Types I, P, some H, and sometimes A are seen "above the Report" -- that is, if they are listed here for Week 7777, for example, they will be found in text files or images of Week 7777. Everything else will be found in a "Report" section of a file two, three, or four weeks later; 7781 in this Example.

If you see any error, please let me know, elden.carnahan@gmail.com.

Key to Ink Types:

WKTITLESYNOPSISINK TYPES
1425 Picture this -- a caption contest Write a caption, either descriptive or in dialogue, for any of the provided cartoons. H
1397 Trope springs eternal Use any of the four provided standard settings -- (a) desert island, (b) bartender at a bar, (c) desert, (d) psychiatrist next to a couch -- and describe a cartoon that includes your choice of characters, along with a caption. H H
1392 Picture this -- caption these cartoons Write a caption, either descriptive or in dialogue, for any of the provided Bob Staake cartoons. H
1384 Of course there are stupid questions! Give us stupid questions, especially ones reflecting Our Current Situation. H
1377 Make your own March Madness Think of some sport, game, art project or other activity that you can conjure up using various items that you might find around the house. H
1348 Same difference Explain humorously how any two or more of the provided items are alike, different or otherwise connected. H
1347 Reologisms Write a clever, funny definition for any of the provided Loser-concocted words and phrases, and/or show they'd be used. H
1345 The confaketionary -- food fictoids Tell us some comically false "fact" about food, drink or dining. 2
1327 Mess with our (or anyone's) heads Reinterpret (or comment wryly on) a headline (or a big part of a headline) by writing a bank head, or subtitle. H
1326 Foaling around "Breed" any two names from the provided list of 100 horses and name the foal to reflect both names. H
1321 Pumping Prime: Amazon reviews Send us a humorous "review" (like the provided samples from our earlier contests) for any of the provided items. H H H H
1314 Bill Us Now -- 'joint legislation' Combine two or more names from the provided list of the new members of Congress to “co-sponsor” a bill based on their combined last names, and state its purpose H
1308 Picture this -- or these This week you have two choices: (1) Write a caption for one or more of these pictures, or (2) explain what is wrong with the picture. You might also combine two pictures into one -- or all four into one. H
1304 All the muse that's fit to print Present a "what if" scenario and explain its effect. 4
1302 Ask Backwards 37 Fifteen "answers" are provided. Tell us the questions. Do one or more, up to a total of 25 A&Q's. H
1244 Primed for product reviews Send us a creative "review" for any of the provided items that are listed on Amazon. H
1204 Well, at least … Note some good news for the coming year to comfort -- or "comfort" -- those who are depressed about the change of presidential administration. H
1184 Plan C -- a third candidate? Explain why some novel person (or thing) should be president; you could also suggest a president-veep ticket. H
1183 C'mon, be honest with us Write something in roughly the form "If X were more honest, (then) Y." 3
1180 Strip search! Find a line of text from any comic strip or panel that appears on the Post's comics pages or on washingtonpost.com/comics, dated anywhere between June 16 and June 27, and either (a) supply a question that the original line could answer, or (b) follow it with your own line of dialogue or reply. 4
1174 Colt following -- It's time for the grandfoals "Breed" any two of the 57 foal names that got ink this week and name the offspring to reflect both parents' names. H
1135 The meter's running Suggest actions in daily life that should require a time limit -- maximum or minimum -- and come with an appropriate penalty for running over (or under). H
1126 Picture this Provide a humorous caption for any of the cartoons provided. H H
1106 Show your resolve Suggest a New Year's resolution that someone might make 100 or more years in the future. H
1098 Prime time for some Amazon reviews Send us a creative "review" for any of the provided items that are listed on Amazon. H
1096 Picture this Write a humorous caption for any of the provided Bob Staake cartoons. H
1081 It's the stupidity, stupid Write us stupid questions that will make us laugh. H
1073 Bank shots: Mess with (y)our heads Quote a headline appearing in the Washington Post, washington.com or another publication, print or headline, dated May 22 to June 1, and supply a "bank" headline that either misinterprets it, as in the examples above, or comments wryly on it. H
1059 With parens like these … Add some words in parentheses to a well-known song title to make it funnier in some way. H H
1048 Ask Backwards You supply the questions to as many of the provided answers as you like. H
1026 'Might' makes ink Give us a joke using any of the using any of the provided "you might be" templates. H

MOST OF YOUR INK

Here is, I hope, most of your ink to be found in the All Invitational Text list. I have to find these with what are called regular expressions, which is a method used in a lot of programming languages to find and modify certain text strings in larger corpora. Basically I look for something like this:

"Report From Week 758"

or

"And from The Style Invitational four weeks ago . . ."

and then some text, your name, and your town, arranged in this familiar way:

"GlaxoSmithKline: I have six kids named Chesterfield, Winston, Lark, BensonHedges, Doral and Kool. If I name my new baby Nicorette, can I get a free coupon for your products? (Jennifer Hart, Arlington)"

I don't catch everything, but I believe I find 90%.

Unlike in the table to the left, I've arranged these in chronological order, so you can see how your humor matured, like a forgotten cheese deep in the walls of an old house. You started out, perhaps in Year 1, sending in riddles you sort of remembered from grade school, and now look at ya, ain't you Dorothy Parker.





[still working on this ...]