PERMANENT INKSTAIN FOR AMANDA YANOVITCH

This is what you've done, each Week. I arrange the rows in reverse chronological order, because there are some Losers, and they know who they are, who check up on my points-awarding every Week.

But I would just like to reiterate that such checking up is not a problem for me. I have said many times that each Loser's enlightened self-interest is my best QA.

If you wish to see what your ink was, refer to the Master Contest List or search All Invitational Text. Remember that Types I, P, some H, and sometimes A are seen "above the Report" -- that is, if they are listed here for Week 7777, for example, they will be found in text files or images of Week 7777. Everything else will be found in a "Report" section of a file two, three, or four weeks later; 7781 in this Example.

If you see any error, please let me know, elden.carnahan@gmail.com.

Key to Ink Types:

WKTITLESYNOPSISINK TYPES
1410 Legends of the fall -- more fictoids Tell us some bogus trivia about autumn, or things that happen (or have happened) in autumn. H
1380 Both sides now Delete one or more letters (in a row) from a word or brief phrase to find another word, and define it. H
1183 C'mon, be honest with us Write something in roughly the form "If X were more honest, (then) Y." H
1179 Blasted alphabetical contests . . . Coin a three-word phrase whose words begin with A, B and C -- in any order -- and describe it. H
1175 Good luck with 13 Make up a word whose Scrabble letter values add up to exactly 13, and define it. 4
1173 Tinker with the recipe Slightly change the name of a food or brand of food (or something else in the food industry) and describe it, or write a slogan, jingle, etc. 2
1168 Asterisky business Tell us an original joke whose punchline can't be understood without knowledge -- not necessarily scientific -- that most of us don't have (which you'll supply with a concise explanation). H
1167 So what's to liken? Take any two items from the provided list and explain how they're similar or different, or connect them some other way. H
1163 Put it in reverse Spell a word, name or phrase backward and define the result in a way that relates to the original. H
1016 Foaling around Breed any two of the horses nominated for this year's Triple Crown races and give the foal a name humorously reflecting the names of the parents. P
1003 Just do it Use a well-known advertising slogan for a different company, organization or product to humorous effect. H
997 Unworthy causes Name a dubious charity and describe its mission. H
996 A Life-Time opportunity Combine two magazines or journals and describe the result, supply a marketing pitch, or suggest a story or two that it might publish. H
994 Stick it to us Suggest a slogan for one of our two new honorable-mention Loser Magnets for 2012-2013. H
993 Versus, verses Write a short "rap battle" between any two characters, real or fictional. H W
989 On the double Come up with a double or multiple profession, and explain how each job complements the other(s). H H
988 A faster break Suggest ways to make sports and other leisure activities more time-efficient or exciting. H
986 Hear here! Give us a sentence or short dialogue that would be a lot funnier if a word in it were mistaken for a homophone of that word. H
984 Another brilliant contest Write something whose words begin with consecutive letters of the alphabet. H H
982 The parody line Set your own, humorous words to the tune of a well-known song--except that you must preserve one of the original lines. H
979 The madding crowd Suggest funny, original ways to tick people off. 3
978 A reason to rhyme the news Write a short verse about something that's been in the news recently. H
974 Eat our dust! Write a limerick humorously describing a book, play, movie, or TV show. H
966 Inkremental change Start with any word or name, and create a series of words that change by one letter at a time, until you come up with a related word or name. H L P
962 Questionable journalism Take any sentence (or a major part of it) that appears in the Post or in an article on washingtonpost.com anytime from now through March 19 and supply a question it could answer. H
959 Out of network Move a current or former TV program (or type of programming) to a different network and explain what would change. H
957 Fearful Symmetry Write a clever passage whose successive words are one letter longer until the middle of the passage, and then become one letter shorter. H H
956 Give us some bad ideas Finish any of the provided "You know" phrases. H H
947 Tour de Fours VIII: Neologisms Come up with a new word or two-word term that includes the letter block N-O-E-L, in any order but with no other letters between them, and define it. H
945 Laugh-baked ideas Cleverly depict a person, event or phenomenon of the 21st century — real history as well as scenes from movies, books, videos, etc. — using edible materials, and send us a photo of your creation. H H
943 Ask backward XXIX You are on "Jeopardy!" You supply the questions for as many of the provided answers as you like. M
939 MASH 2: The Retread Combine two movie titles and describe the result. H
937 Staake it to him Write a caption for any of the five pages or details pictured from some of Bob's more than 50 picture books. H
935 The 400 blows Write a humorous poem--choose your form--about the Virginia earthquake, Hurricane Irene or another well-known natural event. H H
934 Same difference Explain how any two items in the provided list are similar or different. H
928 Play feature Use the title of a movie as the answer to a riddle or other question. H
927 Drive-By Shoutings Write a very short four-line “poem” promoting a product or company, or offering advice to drivers; the poem must rhyme, in ABAB or ABCB rhyme scheme. A fifth, non-rhyming line may state the product name or a conclusion. H
926 Outrageous fortunes Come up with a fortune cookie line that you'd like to see. 2
924 Doomed to repeat it Create "Unreal Facts" about history. H
922 A Banner Week Write entirely new, humorous lyrics to the tune of “The Star-Spangled Banner”; they can be on any subject. H
921 Give Us Willies Write an original Little Willie poem, perhaps reflecting our current era. This is a venerable four-line genre in which Master W. does some nasty thing and doesn't tend to learn to be a Good Boy by poem's end. H
918 Colt Following Breed any two "foals" in today's results, or one foal with one of the real horse names used in today's entries--and name the "grandfoal." The name may not exceed 18 characters, including spaces, and your entry shouldn't remotely duplicate any of today's results. H
917 Wryku Write a haiku--a sentiment that can be broken into three lines with exactly five syllables in the first line, seven in the second, five in the third--on any subject that's been in the news in the last couple of weeks. H
916 Bank shots Take any headline, verbatim, appearing anywhere in The Post or on washingtonpost.com from April 22 through May 2 and reinterpret it by adding a "bank head," or subtitle. H
913 Bring up the rear Move the last letter of an existing word or name to the front of the word, and define the new term. H
907 Naming rite Come up with a creative, somehow fitting sponsor for some public facility or part of one. H

MOST OF YOUR INK

Here is, I hope, most of your ink to be found in the All Invitational Text list. I have to find these with what are called regular expressions, which is a method used in a lot of programming languages to find and modify certain text strings in larger corpora. Basically I look for something like this:

"Report From Week 758"

or

"And from The Style Invitational four weeks ago . . ."

and then some text, your name, and your town, arranged in this familiar way:

"GlaxoSmithKline: I have six kids named Chesterfield, Winston, Lark, BensonHedges, Doral and Kool. If I name my new baby Nicorette, can I get a free coupon for your products? (Jennifer Hart, Arlington)"

I don't catch everything, but I believe I find 90%.

Unlike in the table to the left, I've arranged these in chronological order, so you can see how your humor matured, like a forgotten cheese deep in the walls of an old house. You started out, perhaps in Year 1, sending in riddles you sort of remembered from grade school, and now look at ya, ain't you Dorothy Parker.





[still working on this ...]