proudly resents ...

The Week in Loserdom:

Losers everywhere marveled at the list of crap in Jonathan Paul's giant bag o'crap. TWW was sad so much had already been disposed of, these were all items worthy of being sent to the Czar as possible prizes.

Results of Week XLIII

Summary: Week XLIII^* required Losers to apply themselves to college applications. Losernet entry sharing showed a lot of overlap and near duplication among the regulars. The end result was an interesting mix of inept, crazy, and unqualified college applicants, with Carnahan taking home the drool. TWW editorial board takes particular pride in calling high honors for Genser's entry about his mother's lies.

The Siberian Express: Spotted this week walking in a winter wonderland is Chuck Smith who is, no doubt, searching for that cash he misplaced.

Score Losers: Sullivan locks in at least a one hit a week average for the year by getting her 52nd. Dudzik's contest suggestion and Baniszewski's true life confession put them in double-digits for the year, at ten, tied with Frankenfeld, Reese, and Kocak. Hart suffers a rare restoration blanking, and Romm returns to The Uncle's good graces after a moderate absence.

Week XLVII (Rename a Product):

The Czar, courtesy of Dudzik, offers one of the oddest contests this year. Losers will have no trouble thinking up entries, but even the examples lacked much humor. Yes, sneeze is an odd sounding word for a strange event and, yes, it is funny that Beaver College feels compelled to change its name (will their sports teams still be called the Fightin' Gynecologists?). Still this is not the stuff of great contests. The main hitch seems to be that you are asked to start with something flawed and improve it, but improvements are rarely funny (unless you are improving a joke) so there is little room for a punch line.

The Weak Week Word to the Wise (WWWW) : You've got us stumped. This is a week to try for ink through contest ideas and Uncle's Picks. On the other hand, entries will be short, so he'll have room to print a lot.

Russ to Judgment: On a one-seventeen scale, sixteen being best, Week XLVII gets:

Despite TWW's reservations about this contest, we suspect someone, somewhere, will submit something really good and, if nothing else, it has an original quality to it.

The Week Link (Week 197, T'was the week before Christmas, 1996):

Just in time for Christmas, four years past, the Czar gave us a present of one of the classic contests. David Twenhafel of Silver Spring asked for a contest that did not include "lowbrow fare." Despite the unusual requirement, regular Losers rose to the challenge to twenhafel their efforts and the ultimate results included Romm, Genser, Verrey, Ferry, Paul, Beland, Witte, Reese, Smith, and Hart (who had a triple and the win). Week 197 also included the results of week 194, which featured Art Grinath's third of seven wins (to date). In this case for his helpful advice to grandparents to "Place large dog cages in your living room, each labeled with the name of a grandchild."

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